"may not beautiful but beautifully made these way, believe that perfections are rivals, free to be yourself, speaks only truth, genuinely enjoy the blithe around us, loves the oxymorons, adore reverse manner, that's makes a life like my life"
So i wont hesitate no more no more..my feeling its still show..and still d same as equal as the moment i noe him *oxygen*...anyway today my day start wif cheezles...gila!!i was putting mysev togetha to carry my laundry stuff and crammed everything inside dat washing mechine..lalala..more..more washing liquids..more~~i love assessive smell in my clothes..yesterday i was spending my 110 buck for esprit perfume*dynamic summer edition(tho now winter..lol)* it was a critical mornin and i text from khad keep coming in..thanx..she remind me of my laundry thingy..i was den lepaking at alengz. M so starving tho last nyte i ate alot..ngaaa...control fuds...sigh..i miss him even more
Say hello to the virtual world..finally I get my breathing rhythm like a white horse song…*slow and easy* My second day of the week turn up to be so suffocating. Frankly speakin’ I felt like hanging mysev on d top of Dubai tower and hell let the helicopter thump me. The meaning of busy had become so unfathomable *puzzled by d definition of semester’s first week *. I was assign with this crucial task. Of course I was given less than 24 hours for 2 page essay which twisting ur decipher. I have to breakthrough it in any way tho I have to brag bout this accent of one Malaysia. *confuse whether I’m opposing it or vice versa* I was digging inside my medulla let those tiny lil neuron work harder in this cranial lookin’ for an academic like words. I was bombarded by tons of text for the past 48 hour *plez dun text me wen I’m in claz m reli damn focusing on diz bloody semester okay!* Mr Balachandran glares dagger at me bcoz of my phone vibration..great !!Yet after 3 hours staring on the blank word document I finally come out wif 3 sentence..ONLY!!..i’m totally runnin outta brilliant idea how to write things . I went for discussion at CAIS and gez what m walkin alone in dat windy nite..n pass by construction site and FSGK..just me and the anggin menggila~spooky..n went back a few min before 12 dgn hujan lebat n basah2..fuhhh..starting of semester yang kindda menguji keimanan
It was 12 midnite m kindda resting my back cuz I have this insanity of dealing wif backache since our classes dun posses any ergonomic criteria.Man therez smth inside my pillow n obviously I killed it..since I heard bone cracked inside..
Today I cant even get my meals*havin it at 10pm*..i skipped lunch cuz its seriously busy..n just even in diz busy life I cant stop thinking of oxygen..sigh..*shaking myself..whats wrong wif me* seriously just cant skip a second to think of oxygen..one word dat I try to deny is..missing him..*just admit sya u miss him*..anyway back to da vital point of da day I was in Farida claz today..we’re discussing bout love of money..how much is enough..of course she inspire me to write smth which will come over soon..i love her class cuz she got lots of beautiful saying..and yeah great I was stuck in LAW class for 3 hours at nite by mr bala..huwaaa..noe-ing dat I hate history and sitting numb on my seat wif sakit belakang yang terlampau and start to day dream bout other stuff..really cant bare wif those seksyen 6,7,…yada2..and act 1955..whatever!!!!..bosan gle..
I maybe sound like a creepy obsessive person as i bumped into diz guy yesterday at the airport..we grab d same newspaper and he said "after you.." oh my dior!!hahha..anyway..dats just a sily thing actually cuz i was focusing more on the hottest new on d front page..but he's so cute..i had lost contact wif oxygen (i still wanna use dat name cuz real name isnt allowed)..still cant..u noe..things..uhm..next topic please~i wanna have fun..m so tired today..as adik called so many time to check on his dragonball dvd..sorry i terbawak here..lol..n he stars to brag on d fabulous food dat he had for lunch including roasted chicken for TOMMOROW..m totally in insanity mood..homesick..all sick..heee Then i was involved in writing an essay..suppose to submit it tmmorow..man today is so tiring..i have class at 6 some more..penatnye..i'm so blur blank bout d essay..how to get started..i want a beautiful essay..
Flying back to the place dat u weren’t willing to stay cuz it left a brutal memory..ye ke?haha..nway really not liking d idea of going back. Great wedding again??after arrived at d airport I was urged to get along in wedding ceremony wif JEANS AND T-SHIRT..aduhaiii..why I have to go to wedding tot this week I can get away frm mum n dad wedding invitations yg melambak n sure mati makan byk if m in peninsular now..BUT!here kne go jugak..what a luck,such a decent luck (eeeeeeee)..N GREAT!!my suck way of packin stuff..i forgot my pills,,my gastric pills & few more pill I dunno what was dat for juz ate it for d god sake~back to dat wedding topic which caused me to freeze on dat house for 4 hours..adohh..penat sungguh..i reach my real destination around 1 smth..cant put anything on my mind..sigh..den joking wif kakak college,eishh..putus fius btol aku ni.. After unlocked d door & crammed everything in my room(which is my old room still alone if no mates..yeayyyy) I juz realize I left my towels,no shower cream,no toothpaste no shampoo,no nothing..n great starving.So I was begging wani n nor for car rental number..how come I totally forgot to buy those wen I came wif my uncle earlier..heee..payah btol~ Lately maybe kerana less sugar n low level of sweet so I became unconscious freak!i was makin up paranoid story..i was planning to go out alone suddenly I was in a negative lane..hee..adeke patot I was thinking dat pakcik gonna kidnap me & sell me to philipine..m not gonna make it to marry neal capes..haha..m so paranoid..what if this and that..n obviously I’m in a ..critical homesick..well wif durian issue..adui pening..kay I gez gotta stop bragging now..get some sleep in diz chilly roo
The beauty of travelling in bus..is dat suppose to be an interesting stuff??well beauty lah sgt its rather we dun have driving license or our car is still in the showcase..but for the sake of our environment it’s better for us to take public transportation rather than..u noe…or shall I explain on the combustion of green house gaseous thru our beloved earth. That’s why m feelin like taking off my shirt rite now. Tho those scientist had broadcast so many things on how precarious ice cap level is now but human stays being ignorant! come on ppl this is our universe I mean we share the same skies n oxygen~~unconditional weather still can’t make these people become conscious that our world is on d tip of iceberg. Makin’ this world a safe place isn’t like how u builds a brand new titanic. Even tho if u do have the brand new ship but if u sailing wif the same attitude u gonna hit iceberg once again. We shud wash our tiny brain..luxurious life doesn’t mean anything on the moment u have big tsunami wrecking it..or even Katrina dat sweep it all away..this natural disaster is actually caused by the unconditional health of our earth..to much CFC, assess CO2..save energy save our earth..whats gonna ensue petroleum after 15 years in time..??lots of alternatives energy introduced by brilliant biotechs’ but human still thinks the words alternatives as smth that shud be considered AFTER fossil fuel ran out!!our earth is sick and we have to cure it~its like a final stage of cancer..when people will start to care??hell no good for those innovation of electronic devices dat saves tons of energy..thanx for those petroleum subsidies ..what the hell world..??? FYI we are not the only one who own this earth..those baby in d cradle,those who still inside,those kids at schools..they will grown up one day..knowing dat d world is ruined because of their ancestor..imagine u’re the 7 year old kids,,u gonna grow up 10 years later..seeing this world isn’t really a world..save our planet for future generation!!support green campaign!love u earth..dont let doom day came a day earlier before it suppose to happen..
Damn..pissed..i was so excited clicking on the smp as i saw that cls actually open french class diz sm..argggggggggghhh..suddenly dat bloody shit smp said my limit is 15 credit hour..hellow..m a 3 pointer student okay..dean even!!asal plak 15!!!!!suddenly when i refreshed d page my limit is changing again to 22..fheww..selamat..but then the moment it change my french class dah full..damn..feel like screaming3..gila3!i hate quota..plez2 open another class plez3...huwaaa..m so desperately into diz
What a decent morning..i was left starving wif no breakfast while my lil bro n my mom goin out for roti canai..damn..diz is so not fair..so sorry to someone who called me last nite i was so sleepy n i was talking to d phone as in not really talking..cant even rmember what language i put on..it was alien like sounds..urghmmmm..yeuww..whats dat??sorry..haha..too tired maybe..n diz mornin feyy was like gle..she still think shez in US agaknye..so happy calling me at 5..gila!!n serve rite on her nose~~i use that alien language..i shall put imaginary sign dat I'M SO SLEEPY..still menggosok2 mata while typin..suddenly i remember d countdown thingy..arghhhhhhhhhhh 5 days to go!!!shall i scream hell out loud..i hate goin back there!but then for the sake of my first class honor degree..n ..my CEO thingy..m a HR person..ayyooo..am i really meant to be that kind of person???puzzle..missing my pure science stuff..DNA polymerase..ligase enzyme..huuu..numerical method..trigonometry..huwaaaaaaaaaa..however FREEZE!!i still wanna curse!!who d hell textin me????look my number isnt a public number..damn it~free lah i give u go somewhere else n get drown..n d second time if u too blind to read go buy brailles word..padan mka..when i say no more i mean no more!if u ppl are so ill-witted go back to primary school n learn kesedaran sivik..stupid!
just few more days before goin back,well seem not really have consent to be there~~staying an hour in flyte..m runnin out novels..n absolutely so many things suppose to happened in this holiday. I end up going nowhere..berkabong..che wah..nola..m juz helping mum wif aunts catering thingy..eee..n as everyone noe..i hate wedding!!!i hate to visit one..n what happen diz entire holiday was so f**** s***..urghhhh..every weekend (presicely on Saturday n Sunday…damn) I was forced to go to wedding..y sume org nak married???????nyampah2!!!..i have to escort mom..however wen dad around we all kne terlibat togeda..cuz mom is so malas to cook..huwaaaa..n sebagai akibatnye..i was sakit perut so badly,,n I can’t eat beef for the entire month~~ Well,wen I woke up kne ceramah hebat wif mom..y she even come out wif da word “bukan senang nk faham hati org”..i was lyke oh my hush puppies!!tga xde mood lg nk mention things dat wasn’t supposed to be on air..snap!!hate it lyke hell..n wth wrong wif today is its absolutely nth xcept thinking very much what shud be done after goin back to college soon..haih..more books n papers..n more journal perhaps..great!!i have a massive plan coming up soon..hehe..n suddenly my mom telling me dat therz someone asking for my phone number..damn!!!who r u????berani sungguh!!look get lost n save it for another day..y even asked from my cousin n he tell my mom..shit!i hate this freakin much..get lost..go to hell n never show up in my life..dats it!m not a yellow pages..therz a lot of girls outthere n grab one for d god sake..m so pissed!don’t get near
Wen therz a plan to go for picnic today i was so overreacted+excited..suddenly d skies turn to be so gloomy n it starts raining..how sad..anyway!m ready to rock the world soon!let go those stupid things..i'm no sugar chessy cholestrol freak so leave it damn it..hehe..damn!i cant upload photos
Weekend is the best thing in life. However at home it can be damn disastrous. I was forced to attend wedding ceremony which is.....i hate it...i hate wedding..darn~m hating it lyke crazy!last week i got tummyache cuz i ate sort of beef..i dunno what the heck was dat..man diz week more wedding to go..why sume org nk marry!!Wedding is such a mess
Therez reli smth wrong with the stupid html..i spent my last few hours to renovate the html,,change the coding..man!its so suffering stuck..anyway m gonna comes out wif new renovation after holidays over..n probably around new year..knowing dat i have only 7 days more at home so gotta spend more time jiggling around n giggling wif my lil bro..everything gonna be brand new soon..i cant believe i was inpired by barbie series..man!this is major serious we're talkin bout that pinky disgusting stuff..anyway thanx for the liner of..writing is my life..hahah..very impressive attraction!i lyke d idea of writing in diary is a treasure..nway this coming new year ther will be new stuff!m gonna post lots n lots of new hot patatoes,my 1st own video playing guitar!,pictures n fun facts..so to my follower dats quite a description..m gonna change the entire look of this blog..its been so freakin ugly..well gotta see ya as soon as possible..thousand words worth than a bad picture..n if u sit alone n keep thinking wen u ose 1 thing doesnt mean u lose everything..chill out!
This few weeks had been quite..umm I’m not sure how to read between the lines. Anyway there’s still an intense sentiment within that I presume can’t never be removed till perpetuity (timeline dat cudn’t be delineate). I’m really tired answering questions which I have no idea what to drivel. Just hoping for no more. The truth is just so awkward and hard to explain(bout what juz happen). Even now I have no clue what am I saying.
Well I do bumped into few of my old journal diary collection which I was supposed to open in 5 years time from now…When so many people asked why how what..keep those delayed for a moment cuz I’m not ready to open my case study (wow..it cost a lot for sure)..or maybe I’m not gonna spill it out.
People see me as someone who is really someone. One line “what love?what boys?” can I just skip that..mmm..As if for me I may NOT what u think of..
High taste???
Uuuu..that’s too much (to Julia Ching my darling JC this is ur ans…dun ask again kay babe). Honestly I have the most awful taste in anything. My appalling manner that so obvious to the crowd. (It just can’t be helped at all, frankly speakin). I dun expect for something big. I dun even want a prince on white horse with shining armor. Just enough to someone that could love me the way I use to be. (the sengal and senget and whatsoever world can define me). Just because I dun eat vege and I always being fussy and I always act like a spoil bratand speak English no matter where I stand even in pasar malam, doesn’t mean I’m a girl who cares bout how many cash do u have in the pocket so do how many credit cards in ur wallet. Honestly that’s not even cross my mind. “MONEY THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL” and I have my personal reason. I dun care where u park ur Porsche or ur Lamborghini. Ride a bus also will do (ain’t that sweet taking bus..=)). Material is not love. Love is something that u can’t buy. Probably my scheme of love is a lil bit odd. (can’t remember how many time debatin on dat) .
People always have the wrong idea on me. I just wish for the simple one. Laugh for my jokes (not pretending to). SIMPLE as in everything. I wanna guy that don’t show off.(Yeah I know what u got so cut those broadcasting thingy off). If u’re so so filthy rich u dun have to show it cuz it make me sick (I dun give a damn heed n its not even in d description to impress me). Dun feign cool wen u’re not cuz wen I love u I’ll be keen on everything about u. Absolutely I see no slack on u... Hahaha..no worry if u dun wanna pay for my lunch..i dun tap that so much,n I do eat at mamak stall(I’m not that western freak okay..i’m normal), =)—as long as its clean—cuz I can go bananas..wheuww..(dun ever envisage wen m on top of volcano)..
Yes I do love guys who can play basketball n enjoy rugby (cuz m a big fan of Dan Carter n Kobe Bryant!!!!i love u boys)..n cool enough if that boy can play guitar..hahahha..but dats juz a lame trait dat ever come out in my head… too much reverie I guess (knock..knock..on my head..silly me). I have the prime idiotic idea of dating out on basketball court..come on!of course no boy wud want that..anyway..dey’ll xpect a mushy make out..which I dunno how to do (I never done 1..i have a tragic love story..=)) 3 month for my 1st bf –feeq- and 7 month for the 2nd one –oxygen-..n we never make it to meet each other..how bad..(ahhh JC u make me write diz..u better come home now..aren’t ya for Christmas..i miss u guys)
I’m not so excellent on love topic cuz we dun have text book for this n this isn’t a subject (area under discussion that so twisting n troublesome). I’m not looking for any of those in my description anymore. 1. I’m tired, 2. It’s not worth it, 3. I look stupid on it…therefore (wow...Sounds like conclusion in biology experiment)..my wise clock is ticking again and I had blow the candle off..no more aromatherapy (analogy for sweet romance thing) scent. Dear Jules JC told ya what ERIC may deem before he left us all.(his memory still wif us..may his soul went to heaven)…Fuhh..5 years already now only I have spirit to talk about it.That’s all I can drivel hope it tangible enough. The gate is closed. What remain inside let it be that way. Feeq is my lesson (padan mke me) while Oxygen is the best thing I ever had n I will never forgets. Surely m not in da lovey dovey mood anymore. Just doing my time freezing my ice diamond again.
