Going Away

Today is supposed to be Wordless Wednesday, which I wonder for the dozen-th time why does it have to be wordless. Being as a mid of week I bet its a tough job that people will be in between I hate Wednesday, god god its already Wednesday or even OMG its just Wednesday. Its call living with expectations. Even the days revolves with expectation. How can I not to concerns much if non living things gets that much of expectations, what could have it be for a human. Living into one is always the hardest because we could not achieve all of them. To be fair we have to fail around before we could get there. All you got to do is be strong, stay tough and cruise it with no fears because eventually you will get there.

Speaking of getting there, I'm currently trying to pursue government sponsorship from XX country to work there and most probably live there. My timeline doesn't give me much time so I give myself 5-7 years and thats it. Should be enough because we always have alot of things in our plan and that doesn't mean all come clean and we can swipe it in one shot. So pick this one over everything! If people wonder about my timing to settle down, they can bloody piss off with their thoughts because I dont have any plan of building a family. That's way a long journey for me because from now on before I could start anything I will question why how what! Nowadays everything sounds easy that it done.

Chio see you soon

XXX Bank CEO Issue

Hello Friday, I've been wanting to share bout this famous book in 2012. I know its been 4 months after new year and I'm pretty lame slow.However, there's an incident today that will make me skid away from my main purpose. I can cover that later. Well here it goes, you might not know where I'm working right now, not even know which company was it. This is not the point, let me just put it this way, our company located as a building share basis. So basically we're sharing the same building with few other company. But this building is mainly occupied by this Bank called XXX Bank (even the building was named after it). This building has separate elevator limited to certain floor. So fortunate (literary) my office is on the side where the MD offices is. Still not the point of my story (I'm getting there shortly). Anyway, we're all going down to grab foods from XXX restaurant at KL City Walk and what a pleasant surprise there's this uncle in the same lift making that sour shitty face because it takes time for us to jump into the elevator. Fine, we apologize for our dummies behavior anyway.

The next incident that took place is that we're walking in the lobby where out of sudden a security guard shove us aside. Thinking dumbly that the security staff was trying to avoid from slippery floor since there's a "Cleaning In Progress" sign put on the floor. Huh! However! its actually not that main purpose (thinking lucky for 2 secs) . We are suppose to give way to the uncle we bumped in the elevator. Wondering who the finggin shit he is of course I'm like, got rot in hell. He was actually the CEO of XXX Bank. Seriously, he's a Malay and I've met and joke around with dozens of clients and those founders, CEO, Chairman and I couldn't believe how polite and down to earth are they treating me. Just because he is a CEO we have to be shoved aside like a chicken. Bloody hell, next time I bumped into you I'm gonna complain out loud how fucking stupid building management is and how inconsiderate are they about airconds and stupid elevator rules. We are all human and having power doesn't mean you're superior than other people in such way. Seriously I don't give a damn. If I knew he was a CEO I would've used violent words on him. I'm not scared of his shitty arrogant look. I hope he rot in hell.

Think The Thoughts

From d day the screen name pop-out in my windows I think I like u
On the 1st week u made my life feels like heaven I think I fall for you
On the 1st month I start hanging on u, I think I love u
Its a year we know each other, I think I can't live without u
Its going to be the second year, I think my heart only belong to u
Its the third year where its end I think I dont want to
Its now fourth year I think I still miss you

Sometimes talking too much can make u cry
Sometimes silent can make u die

Across The Globe Hallucination

Too much inspiration can caused an excessive mental stream. This is what I'm afraid of, the "holy shit" ideas gonna keep on coming destroying my brain for the rest of the day. Happy Wednesday, guess I'm gonna be a permanent residence here in this blog. This used to feel like home (I mean a medium to whine). Just to share with those who are not living here (rotting here specifically for me), its blazing hot these few days and currrently praying for a drop of rain (trust me it wont be a drop when it does). Last week was my horrific experience of thunder storms and flash floods here in Kuala Lumpur Malaysia. To be exact I have no idea people keep on developing and building some shitty sky-scrapper but so sucks at maintaining  the tunnels and drains. Please, wasn't it gonna cost more when the damage is done. What a weird move!


Anyhow, today's delusional thoughts and hallucination still haunting me even when I'm wide awake. What is this hassle call brain? I think I saw someone or the one that got away. The person that claim he is in UK one year ago and watches over me even when he's away hundred miles away and even in different time zone. I wonder where all those nice thing disappear. I think I saw the doopleganger regardless of my fucking dream last night. These few days my brain activity seemed distorted. I remember something that I wasn't suppose to remember. I wanna feel something that I've already lost long time ago. I'm start hoping for something hopeless. Yes, heart and brain because what makes you different makes you beautiful (i've been listening to this crap). Playing sophomore song list really dont help at all. Screw what ever demon that goes iside my head bringing back this scary films and swear to god its killing every ounce of my cell. I think I have depression and now shud I visit psychiatrist ???

I hope the day end soon, and well despite of having piano class today. I can't wait to work on my project. I called it LH07 hahaha!

Inspirational Wednesday

Love & Prayers For The Victim

There's nothing more troubled than having a morning news reporting how pathetic some group of people in destroying others life. My love and prayers are for those who badly injured in Boston marathon. Speaking of these bombing activity I just wondering how world can turn this violent just because of the stupidity of a portion of senseless human. Or I shouldn't be calling them human.

New Cover, Horrible Saturday, Monday Ended

I had a horrible Saturday ever! (well most of my saturdays start out sucks anyway). I've got myself an L license now and currently been working on P. Horrible experience ever in my education life! I've never had a moment that I'm scared the shit out of me just because of some learning process. I'm risking my life driving a car for the first time. It was fun speeding but no fun bearing the numbness on your feet (screw those accelerator break & clutch damnit). It was all fine in the morning, I did my parking smoothly and the slopes was alright, anyhow I was born harsh and rash. How am I suppose to pull the gear gracefully?!! tell me?!! Well thats fine not until the part where a teacher I dont bother to care who the figgin shit he is but he shouted at me. Thinking I was going to turn at the parking spot. Seriously I have common sense, what kind of asshole will turn at the side by side parallel parking. Hello my IQ is obviously higher than you uncle~ people are so insensible these days. He screamed for the fun of it, the fuck he thinks. I seriously have some major anger management issue so be it!

Moving on! I have a new hobby of doing cover for people's song ( a cover is not a plagiarism isn't??) Anyway if you care to view my pathetic hobby here's the link [http://ashvexvile.tumblr.com/] ;) Just apart of my useless life, I wasted every 30 minutes screaming on other people songs. Actually been working on my own songs. I dont mean to make it commercial but I just wanna create something on my own, the way I express myself through songs. Some stuff are are to express in writings or even conversation. Maybe songs will work!

Anyhow, Monday gonna end soon, for me my day ended after 5.30 pm on weekdays C=

See you tommorow cheerios!

I'm warning you

This has been the most emotional blog that contains explicit thoughts right from my neurons. I may have been the most non-forgetful person on earth when it comes to past events. People, day after day I just can't say sorry anymore. I may have reciprocate synonims with antonyms that resulting error in vocabulary. Pardon me if you said "move on and forget the past"..well well well speaking of moving on. I am moving on and this is the price I'm having because of those dozens and hundred millions of odd conditions. How can you forget the past you asshole, seriously, it is something that destroy you inside out and you said everybody and everyone on earth should forget it. Its like getting North Korea to forget South and move on (will it work?).

Let  me brew your goldfish brain, I cant be moved. Nothing will move me on because my thoughts and wrath is still there. I'm warning you!

I mean it because im mean

Imaginations brings you out of your life, make you achieve your dreams and make you creative. Well that is just an exordium of my post. Tell me in 5 words, oh no make it 3 words, how to live a happy life. Seriously if you yourself look troubled and keep on trying to preach the whatsoever because I just wanna divulge from todays onwards (reminder) that all of you had caused me to be this rebellious woman.
People are wondering the hell had gone into her (me). Call me disgrace (maybe) call me bad. Because "some" people just dont realize they may have caused me to be this dark person. Swear to go I'm scared of myself because I cant estimate or even anticipate what im capable of. Before I learn to speak my language now, it was so bad in the past that it keeps on rolling in my head. Accumulating anger, bottling up wrath and dozens of sheer piece of madness streaming in my vein. Until the point I do not know myself anymore. Blame who? (just please dont make me laugh over this trivia questions)

Blame the preachers, blame the people that coming sickly from the pores. Thank you for their wrong approach and thanks for their ferocious comments  I manage to become a person like me ! Please enough showing off the kindness to world, stop trying just please. I will not digest anything shallow because for now my thoughts is based on my believe. I believe for what I believe it is..You may hate me I'm receiving the hates with my open arms, I may have corrupted my mind and I dont wanna look back. That typical preach, that super typical sensitivity and extremely typical opinions. I can't breathe in that very shallow oxygen circle. Round applause the shows over, please go back to your swamp (i mean it because i am mean)

The life, longer than your breath

Hey peeps, its been a while, it shows I'm enjoying my life. A reminder to everyone, you have right to yourself, don't listen to others opinion. Another reminder is mind your business in your ass. You live the life, you know the hell is going on. My notes, just hold it right there if you wish to further reprobate my demenor.

Seriously, nowadays, people are so laughable especially the way they preach good deeds (I know when I need to repent myself). Those wannabes that growing in the society is so sickening. These days it becomes a viral trends and they are like patogens coming out from pores. Fine, if I have to forget the historical event but I believe each of us made a mistake. Each one of us has grown up and wake up the next day everything that you plan is just obsolete and its a beginning of a new start, regardless of how bad it can be. And who are you to know what others are struggling to fight in their life. Who even give you rights to judge when the whole world are moving in the axis where justice is never right today. I'm not being an ass but the world make me. I have lived through every bitter things that I'm sick of sreaming about it in my head. So please, anybody who wish to project their preach on me, I'm sorry you're just putting a fifth wheel on me.

I'm very frank in these kind of things because if you weak people will stab you, step on you trample you and throw you like a piece of dirt. You can veil your dark shades but I know your true color. If you have done it once there's no way you will do it twice. I don't believe innocent face, preaching good, that is a garbage if people will want to buy. I have stories written somewhere for me by my creator. I am this person. I love my haircuts, I love loud music and dance, I love whatever that you hates. So suck it up.

Rotten

Earth is just another painful place I would rather burry myself and die. I just could not understand why things goes that way. First of all relatives are suppose to be the safest place we could run to. Happen to be some people just being mean and hateful. Every single minute that I have eating my brain out. Trust me sometimes I give up giving chances to people outthere because they never deserve it. I have life to live and i have my own hardship that I expect ppl to understand live with it and not putting us at the bottom.

What happen tonight just a shallow hatred and i decided what comes next will be me and always me. Why do i need to trust them my relatives. They just a bunch of grown ups who doesnt know how to make ppl live their life easy. They always wanna put smth bad in return of our happiness. Such a shallow circle i have. I wud rather bring my family and my youngest aunt to live in states living those crappy ass here rotten in Malaysia. Trust me i need a moment of chucky. Too bad chucky died. I'd kill for a person to talk to me but i only open up to one person and he died a 2 years ago!

Swithching Blog

Hola ! Happy Eid Mubarak everyone :) just wanna tell ya i have new blog that i just started posting some stuff here it is LisbethLee.blogspot.com ;) love xx