Tuesday, December 21, 2010

:( what an errand.

I went to Bukit Bintang yesterday. I've been in super depression and even depressed wen I came across samsung galaxy s :( I want......I was looking for executive's apparel which i managed to find one piece. I'm on green fever (new green shirt). I was forced to KL, now i'm going insane. I was talking to a sales girl who happen to be sarawakian. Hish, gago jak mk klaka sawak. The crowds reli makes me dizzy and almost hell puke. I'm risked to puke to death because of crowd-sickness syndrome. The most is everywhere is samsung galaxy S!!!! I went through evening rain and prepare for dinner at 8. Away frm my lil misery. Okay non of d activity workin. :(

I'm Sucks

Good Morning!have u ever feel like been swept away by cyclone and you tried to turn ur world around but nothing changed. This is rather insanity of personal, apparently..For the past few days I've been in total misery with excluded reason in writing. I was on a little mission to study human behaviour and selfishness. Hence, I ended up leaking alot of points and I had no idea how to figure it out everything. I'd rather come out with very clumsy conclusion which is human are all selfish. However, I was wrong when the day somebody advise me wisely and I shud thanked him for opening my eyes for every invisible sights. I was seeing with emotion not my wise brain. I was obviously a total bitch keep on raging around my reckless temper. I really hate my temper (always hating it). Special thanks for reminding me my current irrational state. Ths person is really special that he makes me realize everything around me is functioning. Something that I always abandon whenever I got some serious miserable thinking. Honestly I'm sucks in personal god knows how. I'm glad I still known someone in the world that makes me become wise. I'd like to become someone who will put a thought before actions. I dun wanna make severe decisions dat can destroy my credibility as a human being and future HR. However, my head is still down under extreme misery. I have such lumpish attitude, once u break in u need to keep on walking until u found smth that u need to find.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Result Real :)

I 'm so hell excited. Of course the result is out :) and awesome!Thanks my almighty! I think I was d last person who login to smp. Its officially yesterday but u noe, i drained my few bucks sending ill-ed text messeges to unimas sms service. Seriously, I did checked my personal detail twice, i tot it was someonelses' account. Correct! its my name on it and my stupid passport pic. (urgh..=D) above of all m so head over heels. Thanks for last minute inspiration and thanks for being a freezing chick for 2 weeks in library, thanks for being such a creepy asshole and sociopath breakdown living thing in that library. Not forgotten thank to my lecturer, the most to miss farida :) finally she gave me A..fheww and Mdm Sheilla as well, next time we'll have an errand a month earlier and bout that level of learning, never mind, i get the point now :). Almost flat, I think I know why and I know how. Another dean list! love u books and everything !

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Invisibility Choice

Sometimes talking too much can make you cry
Sometimes silence can make you die

I prefer invisibility in the choice because
What left in the option were only despair and frustrations

Yes, there's a line to walk thru but the lines was ruined by a fierce tornado
Fogs covered our eyes, so I shall took another road
Where to start? There's no need cuz you already walking (looking at my feet)

Its sunset.Keep walking.I'm through.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Episode 4: Malacca Errand (: [Shopping?Whattaya Think]

Sunny day here in Malacca, again I was drowned in epic memory. Remembered in one occasion I fell in Malacca Zoo! Well I ripped my knee precisely. I know I got bad chicken legs when I travel around. The journey of obsevation, of course sneaking eyes into some hot Honda City, Black is so elegant honestly. Alright my first car will definitely be Black! we have "ikan bakar" wow yummy!!!i love today errand :) Okay ppl, whattaya think about SHOPPING? I mean as for some girls its their life and death. Discount and sale season are what driving them mad besides hottie. I'm not a shopaholic reli am not, but I know some of d random facts bout girl and shops. you can tell that I'm not a shopping-maniac that runs insane over shimmering gold cards.
So is it true girls, women are those who shud check-in in mental asylum on festive season. WHY?its sale, UP TO 70% . Tell me, I never had this fantastic insanity on grabbing and groping everything I saw in the Mall. Some people who shops alot usually in that kind of group (miss universe-like-girl). That's funny cuz I'm a girl too. However, to defend my own kind, I have no idea how to doubt the burden of proof "see!its 50% off.omg!!" she, the one who say it is a girl. Oryte I know that shopping waste money but, what kind of definition do u give on word shopping? the measurement that u use in shopping. Shopping, basically does not mean we buy the entire store. I think depend on person definition. We can't possibly say shopping is evil. When someone said shopping we choose to turn 180 degree into negative statement. Its just how a person view "shopping". Whether its a verb meaning evil or anythingelse.
Well, the gender issue must be teken into account. I mean, boys love shopping too, regardless of they are metro, retro or whatever -ro they are. One thing I respect over these dark-side of bad "shopping" term, girls will consider bargaining for less price,boys will go for -no matter how expensive they are-.,thats what i think. I prefer to define shopping as something nice and innocent tho..So, taht's all for today, nites!

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

"keep telling myself that its not worth it, i already know i don't deserve it"

Episode 3: Cooking-fever [the tomyam and empty rice cooker]

Think this is the only way that makes me feel like a bit insane and amnesia. “Cooking” I just culdn’t believe it! I went cooking the black pepper beef [1], the seafood tomyam [2], taufu [3], egg-things [4]. Of course no vege!cuz I freaking hate vegetables. I dunno who eat all the crap dat I cooked but the rice cooker was empty : ( somebody takeover the world and eat all the food! Was it dat tasty, I think so..lalala..so the responsible people who finished everything had to go out to buy a dinner. They went back home that afternoon and eat everything. Fhew, that means my cooking wasn’t that bad, its just my lazy cells dominates me. Huahuahua..I’m so not me anymore! I cooked, I did my laundry without somebody screaming at me. I’m so an “ALIEN”. Who am I??Scary tho! The very next day I tried an insane thing, “Fried Black pepper Chicken fillet”

1. All the spices dat u need the most is the black pepper

2. Chicken fillet (that took 30 minutes to clean it using 2 pairs of glove and never stop screaming over the blood!tho it’s a breast part

3. Salt and whatever

4. An egg

5. Flour (the one with spicy flava)

Alright put all the spices on the chicken, shall I said marinate ‘em. Hmm, put some salt so that it taste better. Getcha egg and mix it it with the fillet and those spices earlier. Okay on ur stove and getcha oil hottttt….final stage when ur oil is ready, put it in the flour, please make the flour covered all the fillet and wallah throw it in the frying pan..caution: dun let it black baked crisp. Ish ish ish…

Episode 3 ¾ (flashback): Add Math Tutor

Okay, if its biology, chemistry or even modern math, I can do it. Seriously, those were awesome things but add math. Freaky freaky freaky !

Episode 2 ¾: “Life as a Taxi driver”

Last nite I gotta a town ride wiv my dad, after he finished his stuff in Jalan Duta. It was late 10.45 p.m. Yeah, nothing much changed in KL since I studied there. Except there’s a new neon light on The Mall (did remind me of my youth, was my playground once). I wonder if inside still d same, especially the Bread Story and the ABC thing. Oh yeah, wonder if the Mc Donald still crammed with our high school student when it’s not holiday. We ride pass thru my old classic school (I guess now, it’s not classic anymore, dey got some Netherland influence in building structure, think it was there since before the independent..since dey got sum of money frm the ministry, they renovate the school. Truthfully, I hate d new look of the school, I hope they dun cut down that Autumn tree !) The car moving thru Jalan Tun Razak to Jalan Parliament and I dunno what Jalan anymore there, I wasn’t the type that memorize the road really well. Here we are at Jalan Pantai Bahru. All the shops were closed. Suddenly I saw a Taxi right next to our car. I saw the clock on my car. Its half past 11 already, these Taxis still wondering around getting passenger. I felt a sudden rush in my head, imagine how hard these people working. They dun care what time it was. While other people lying on their Dunlop pillowand Vono mattress these people drive through the entire town getting money to fill their growling tummy. As if they never care on sleeping either. God bless these people. People are whining on how hard their life is, while they still have house to sleep, they still have night for themselves and they still can afford McDonald and KFC for food. These are not “hard”, these are ungrateful people. Those people outthere there are more that homeless, some with kids waiting at home (starving) waiting for their father to bring something home. They couldn’t afford a fried chicken for everyone; they don’t drink coke, just plain water; cold and plain. I did learn smth. We’re on our ride home, seriously sleepy. Nights ;)

Episode 2 ½: The InterView

We got major probs because we’re there but we cudn’t find the way in. Hilarious wasn’t it. Alright we’re in, what now? The security guard on d counter never heard of the company,how pathetic until I said C-11. Here we go, at level 11. He was so blur and I speak Malay anyway. I said “Victor Group”. Its futile talking to him so I get mysev upther and a chinese man open the door for me. Yes..yes..m the one who got appointment for internship’s interview. Guess what the CEO is actually the one who gonna interview me..okay relax! Remember this is board interview chapter 5 recruitment in human resource planning, recruitment and selection. Chill2! I obviously make some educated look sitting on the chair while waiting Miss Jasmine to call out my name. Ok, I got serious lup-dup in here and to stay calm I went checking my files (SPM certificate, Matric Transcript, Temporary Transcript, National Chemistry Quiz, Innovation Award, Dean Lists Award, Demonstrator for Biz Math..all checked!!!) fhew…okay he called me in, duhhhhhhhhhhh…I said my internship 10 month! What the hell, ok I’m nervous anyway.LOL. it was only 10 week. Funny, I got a lil chat with a CEO like a professional. What the hell m I doing I talk about current issue and my deep interest in development. Whoa!!!I was a HR manager for a second J He said if I were able to revise the duration of intern he’ll hire me as well !how heaven, now I got serious hatred with my university. Unimas we need to talk! Huhu..

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

3 hours and this :(

I drained my 158 buck :,(

Episode 2:Holiday-shopping

Hye KL, kindda spending my loner time shopping at SOGO just now, erghh I got a fatigue legs :( , tmorrow I got some serious interview, fhew sortta nervous like ALOTSSSSSS !! i wish i still got my luck charm :( if u read ths , TOO BAD CUZ YOU OWEZ BE MY GOOD LUCK CHARM.. btw i got a pair of ELLE shoe. Its extremely hard to make a choice. Plus its raining, jeez walking around like a lone ranger. I'm so tired and so nervous for tmrow occassion. just kill me wiv a dagger please oh please. I see sogo had changed eversince i graduated frm matric, i had no time to
walk around, keep on hanging out at my hometown. Its been a long time. Btw stop the epic things, WHO LOVES TANGLE UP RAPUNZEL????lets watch!!!huhu,,oryte as i promise m gonna post some of my kitchen horrific..haha..btw one last thing~ Hey ppl outther i gotta question, if u miss someone like crazy but u dun wanna say it till d day u die, what shud u do so that he knows??greathumbpin =,<

my other spot : http://neverhidevein.blogspot.com/

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Episode 1: Holiday

Its holiday everyone (fer a malaysian student like me its heaven). I havent got any 4 weeks holiday eversince my second year. It was obviously torturing me. i went half frenzy treating my mom kitchen, woaaa,, i dunno what had gone into my mind because for the past few hours i just thinking about cooking :) Unfortunately my bluetooth seemed not workin now so i gotta postpone my activities report in diz bloggie :) i made an awesome pudding, fruttie and i sneak into my refrigerator to find a nice cold choco Walls icecream. I dip my spoon over it of course. The pudding taste good, not bad for a beginner , i noe the presentation was bad because I got some serious probs on cutting it, my lil bro runaway wiv the whole thing because it taste good (pffftttt perasan sudehh)..then..i made carbonara wiv peas and basil sprinkle..:)) this is my favs, so far dats all my stuff, we need to keep busy..HOWEVER!!!the best thing is my daddy bought like 3 dozen of novels..the 38 buck novel each..and m gonna snap my pics wiv all of it..is sufficient for my entire holiday i guess..seriously 3 dozens, i merely suffocate frm excitement urgency..I love the holiday this time . I have a great time on my own, wiv my lil bro and everyone at home. I just love the holiday!Yeay..tho m kindda .... but nvr mind that's not taken into account,just get mysev happy oryte, u too people, be happy outthere :)

Thursday, November 25, 2010


If u listen to me talk to me. If u sense my feels please dun let it burn. Occasionally trying some cognition with tammy. This thing really stiff and mute. Talk to me, anyone just talk, talk anything dat can make me sleep with smile, talk about something dat u really want to talk about. Just keep talking and I'll do d listening. Anyone? *pufffff.... no sound..just d air around me trying to say smth that i cudnt digest in my brain. What is it wind? Does d news dat bad until u have to blow everything around? Poor d flying papers, poor the hands that pick it up ): I just wanna listen when people. Okay
1. In total depress
2. Please my head is so miserable
3. What is it with today?

I cant figure it out what the hell is wrong. I noe its funeralmood


"Semalaman, terkenangkan dirimu, sanggup ku singkirkan semua, kisah yg lalu...mengapa kau sanggup meninggalkan diriku..."

Feeling so helpless today
Sensing no energy flowing today
Truthfully, I'm lost in my own brain
Where m I
What m I
How m I here


My brief explaination on OL

Swear to god I can't sleep. Alright, lemme digest what I've been read for tmrow's exam. Basically everything about knowledge but 1st u need to understand what is organizational learning, I mean this thing u can't simply memorize because u can end up having "malfunction" neurons. Organization learning is simple, how organization adapt to change, develop new ideas, insights for their development and growth. Ther r several forces dat trigger these OL things. (remember!undertand, dun memorize). Give u an analogy kay, OL is like u going to another continent, in order to adapt and survive u need to learn, if u stay ther like a dead-shell u'll die. Either frm starvation or anything else. Oryte there are 5 learning principles in OL, personal mastery, mental model, shared vision, team learning and system thinking. These 5 principles correlates wiv each other, if u wanna see how it works u'll figure it out in practices and tools chapter. That's just a principle of learning, now moving on to the learning process (i cant believe m doing diz). This is the crucial part but dun forget 5 principle is very fundamental dat u can relates to d processes of learning. 1st, identification. 2nd, Generation/creation. 3rd, diffusion. 4th, integration and 5th, actions. In learning you'll get thru these 5 processes. Identification helps to facilitate d indentifications of noeledge internally and externally by making the internal one visible while accessing external source of new noeledge. Okay look very carefuly this 1st process, it involve all basic 5 principle earlier. I noe its hard to understand. Simply, its actually when u identify whats the problems, whats relevent to ur business. When it comes to generation and creation. This is d core of the process. u need to create the knowledge. Knowledge creation is smth complex dat u cant simply program. When u have more explicit noeledge the chance to dev. new knowledge is high. These matter relates to the 4 cyclical SECI model. You guys need to combine d note in order to understand tho. In knowledge creation it involve 2 famous thing, TACIT + EXPLICIT. haaaaaaaaa...1st understand dulu whats tacit and explicit. Tacit is basically knowledge frm experience while explicit is the facts. Tacit knowledge u cant simply documented, so we need to tranform d thing into explicit, explicit knowledge u can document it...the 4 SECI spiral thing is a CYCLICAL process..starts with SOCIALIZATION(share) -->EXTERNALIZATION(articulate)-->COMBINATION(connect)-->INTERNALIZATION(embody)..
I love diz part cuz i got some analogy for it. This thing is like u wanna find a guy or a girl. 1st, socialization, rember in socialization u share knowledge thru joint xperience. Its like wen u and ur frens going to a party searching for a boy, okay,u wanna find somebody that has what u needed. Same goes to noeledge, the place (ba) for diz phase is party (originating ba). Its a face to face thing. If u wanna noe him of course u approach him and u starts to talk about smth dat u wanna find in common. Moving on to d second phase, externalization, u start seeing each other because he got what u want, u start to meet his frenz, and get to know him deeper. You exchange numbers u text him in ym by 3G or video callin skype. Its dialoguing ba. In this case i use YM as the virtual place for dialogue. For knowledge d example is Lotus Notes, IBM:Team Focus. Then Combination phase, connect explicit knowledge frm diff sources into new systemized knowledge. Okay all info bout him dat u get frm his background, friends, teacher, neighbour and whoever lah, u kindda arrange them, preparing for next stage. In this phase u'll be supported by systemizing ba,indirect interation among ppl in group. If nak senang ingat i assume, i love him, i noe bout him, his frenz and family so indirectly i'm related to them, need to respect his family, his culture, his friends or whatever since i dah collect data dr few source before. Okay next phase is, u planning to get married in internalization. You get married then, whatever data that wujud dlm ur brain u exersize it in exersizing ba..huhu..for example, he dun eat pineapple , so when u cook jgn letak pineapple..oryte..or u wanna prepare smth like a recipe frm his mom, so u assimilates d knoledge time combination dulu2 tu and embodied dat thing. Dun forget bout ART system, simple je art system, its smth dat trigger us to move frm othr learning mode to another mode. For example culture system. If dlm organization, diorg mite foster org culture, brula dpt move to another phase. ART system ni basically dye detect d discrepancy, contohnyela..Best Practice..inside best practice tu u guys have to do diz and dat..so if kat one phase u guys kne fulfill it, nak xnk terpakse la..Example yg Wall Mart tu..dey have scheduled meeting to discuss what happen in operation. Every Friday kalo xsilap. So nk xnk, terpakse la manager go around d floor observing, approaching customers. See kan dye trigger tu. System dye culture of conducting meeting every Friday.. :) Evaluation of Organization Learning, dun be scared kawan2, this is juz a measurement mcm anova tu..haha..u wanna measure OL so u look on its intellectual capital, dlm intellectual capital tu plak ad 3 dimension human, customer and organizational. Actually u guys bleyh measure using performance gak..IC tu just one of the ways. Don't memorize, u guys need to understand what the animal called IC, refers to Dr Dursit talks dat day..but then they say diz IC ni kindda susah sket nk diterima cuz ad little solid foundation, mostly diz thing handled by managers, of course la d process dlm company, diorg yg measure, xmcm OL pnye theories, yg relates dgn psychological, management, social and whatever lg la..dlm chapter 2 yeee..IC ni xde theories sgt..kindda difficult for practitioner to disucc bout it, cuz dey dun have foundation, nk bincang kne ade foundation kalau x cmne nk bincang, pasal ape? xkn tetibe je..how odd la kan..Malas dah nk further explain, tp after knowledge creation tu, diffusion kay, followed by integration and last skali action. Before I slipped away, remember the KOLB learning cycle, very important !!! Oh m so tired !Thats all..

Until the very end. She still LOVE him.

Closed my eyes, breath as deep as I can, exhale slowly and chant a word "i'm okay". Thats quite a good tips. There's a friend of mine, she loves diz man so much, as much as she couldn't explain herself. Whatever she did, she only envisage him. She look as gay as I cud be now, but, she's like d girl in d song brick by boring brick (paramore). The clock strike 12 and everything she love went away, like ashes. She did things just to make herself not feeling peculiar, just wanna comfort her own heart. (In another word, she lied to herself bout being happy). She tot she was there and he will hold her hand whenever troubles coming, she tot he will get thru everything together with her. She was wrong because, the clock had strike 12 and like evry fairytale, the prince has to leave so she has to wait. She wait and wait until d clock went rusty, her feeling for him will never change. She cried and cried, like d tears almost turn to blood. One day the man dat she loves came and said, stop loving me. But the man does not understand how much she loves him. How much every single day she thinks about him. How much she wants to be beside him. The man doesn't understand, the man leave her. There she was, until now, her love is still for him. The hardest part she learn in love is, its hard to make people understand how much we love them. That's all for today. Wish me luck for exam tmrow :(

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

LoveHate 2010

Packing time! tho tmrowI got one last nuisance paper. Well i saw tons of grizzles over d subject tmrow, here tips friends, dun gettcha self miserable, then only u can understand. I've cleaned my closet with d widest smile ever ! :] No one has to remind me anything cuz I always remember, prepare things early ;] yes! going back ! take a bow everyone, diz semester is almost over, here come d final semester ! New Year is on its way, m gonna be as gay as ever. Close the year book and it's time to open a new page ! 2011 ! m just so excited over it. Feel good after such long time leaving this blog, back to the root..its just minus some curse words,,huhu. LOVEHATE 2010 ! I'm just living my life to d fullest :)

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Content really contagious- Cheryl Cole -Parachute


Alright, lets start chewing d fats..It was my very first time going back late frm library. I'm not a grade-grubber okay, went ther to online and finish notes. I can cheers for my last paper diz coming thursday and my plane on d next day :) Quite awful as I'm d only human exist in dat bus-stop and shucks, its dark. I got some serious night blind esp, for right sight. Vision 1020 i guess or even worst. Funny thing, I was glaring at these 2 i dunno what gender r ther, u see trying very hard to do some mental representation in my head. Screw d stingy uni lights. I can't see. Seriously, the bus stop had me apple-up! Chuck d bus comin so late dat I coud not stand d creepy-ness in d air. 1st, its quite isolated, 2nd its dark, 3rd no one ther except me..I started to thik d pitch I shud use to scream hell if anyone or "anything" unpleasant crush over me.."I'm cooked". The bus came 30 minutes after I freak out, for d godsake please be punctual,,jeez these people..d bussie who drive like a funeral car.. :<..my spec went missing, i had to use d old one which totally browned me off..the degree is not equal, dat old rubbish..btw, m being bubble-brain yesterday over sum "Dell" thing.(if u ppl notice d inverted coma, its more den just a noun) Mad-mug session, u see..m getting insane i guess, haha,,oryte forget bout dat lil gossiping, gotta go for real education adventure !

Monday, November 22, 2010

The American Slang. I'm jitterbugging now.

The American slang 4 inch thick I found in my university library :) 5 words per day keeps ur head insane straightaway :D
1. Lookie-loo - customers who enjoys looking at d merchandise but has no intention to buy it..erghhh..lemme rephrase..its window shopping..duhhh
2. Jive-ass - insincere and unreliable person..
3.Nertz! -expression of frustrations..its kindda dialect for NUTS..
4. Let it lay - forget about it!
5. Shuck - smth nonsense and lil worth ( ohhh whatta shuck!)
Its kindda awesome reading diz book, btw i can tell 97% were ol talking dirty and sex thing. I noe more den enav bout dirty things..hoho..Be back wiv more lunatic slang..lol

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Yeay to the world

I was google-ing this................ >>>>>>>>>>>

Since I was so obsessed wiv Tulips I kindda have loads of tulip's bouquet collections. I feel awesome everytime I gaze on these fantastic flowers. Omg can't wait fer tulips sale next year i supposed. Ahhh, its still way along day to go..I remember d last time dey had SALE..in JJ, Mid, KLCC..gosh i was there buying one piece of it..1st its fer mother's day apparently i was too greedy mysev..weeee..I feel relieved now cuz i dun have to feel d bipolar sickness in my head. I have 2 more paper to go before flyin back!I wanna do evrything! Every single thing dat i missed doing it wen I was on that long jet plane going nowher..:) Yeay to d world !

Ellegant Black

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